I think more of the future, most of the time. My past contains a lot of lessons, and a lot of memories, good and bad. But it really cannot take priority in my thoughts - I can't afford to get hung up in the threads of what has been done already.

I concentrate my thoughts on the present, doing all that needs to be done now to make  a  good life for those I am responsible for, and helping those I can connect with to be happy in their own lives. And I think about the future, planning my steps to accomplish my goals successfully, plotting my route through what will come, and sending out positive thoughts to create a wonderful, blessing-filled future.

What we believe becomes real (I am living proof of that!), but the past cannot be affected by our thoughts. I see a beautiful future, and so it will be!

I hope/plan to be reincarnated as a more compassionate, more intuitive, more successful human being, with the opportunity to help other people to reach their highest potential from Day 1.

 

MOTHER

When I swam
an embryo
in my mother's womb
curveting in the ocean
of amniotic fluid
did she guess
what kind of daughter
she would birth?

Could she imagine
the challenges I had chosen
to face,
to conquer?

Could she imagine
the lives I had lived
before,
and yet to come?

Did she know
as I learned
to be human again
here, now,
she would change
as much as I?
that we would evolve
together, apart?

Respectful acquaintances
we have always been
What does she think
I will become?

©2008 Hillora M. Lang

 

SURREALISM

Wandering the streets
            of Florence,
danger awaits,
floodwaters sweep.

Responsibility never ceases
            once taken up,
there is no rest,
until all are safe.

Cardboard box in hand
            I gather them in,
adding to my load,
frantic with fear.

Nine, twelve, sixteen,
            are nestled inside,
filling my life,
overflowing my heart.

Until I lift the pea-green
            and realize once again,
dream kittens weigh
next to nothing
            when I wake.

©2008 Hillora M. Lang

 

SERVANT

Self-appointed high priestess

in the Temple of Bast

I am on my knees

scooping the fifth litterbox of the evening.

My vestments - the golden collar,

           azure silk chiton,

                ornamental headdress -

           must be packed away in mothballs.

Khaki shorts and t-shirt will do

for this acolyte, this devotee,

servant of the great goddess Bast,

Mother of Cats.

c 2008 Hillora Lang

 

AGE/OLD

Outside of time,
            outside the lines.
I am soul-touched,
            ambiguous.

I will break the rules,
            Never ask a woman her age.
            Never tell anyone how old you are.
            Don't date yourself.

At fourteen
            I couldn't become thirty
At twenty-nine
            I couldn't imagine forty.
At thirty-five
            I swore that was enough
                        thank you very much.
            And started counting backwards.
At seventy
            I would be one again.
                        I lost count.

Gathered around the table
            with the Buddhist women,
                        I am filled with confidence.
"Ask me how old I am,"
            and someone does, laughing.
Two hundred and seventy-three.
            Don't I look good for my age?
Next year I'll be three hundred and twelve.

I will live until I die.
And then some.

©2008 Hillora M. Lang

Someone who willfully causes harm to another. Whether it is someone who takes a life, or destroys it through unkindness; whether it is someone who abuses another person or the planet; whether it is someone who hates and causes pain, or feels pain and hates because of it - I would have a very hard time finding forgiveness in myself for such a person.

I live a life which is filled with helping others, and taking responsibility for creating good in this world. I would find it hard to love someone who tries to destroy the good world, and to create one filled with pain and suffering.

To accept Abundance! I was raised in a family which had very skewed attitudes towards money, and so I have never really been at peace with abundance. Even now that I have learned that the Universe wants me (and all of the world!) to be filled with abundant blessings, I have to keep reminding myself that I AM worthy!

How to reach out to other people; how to put myself on the line and be open in a way which makes me vulnerable; and to trust that the world really is a wonderful place, despite those who try to make it otherwise.

Okay, so this is a shameless attempt at self-promotion! I have been blessed to be named as February's Featured Member in the Gaia networking Group, and have received so many warm and wonderful words of welcome (how's that for alliteration?). But I want to answer more interesting and insightful questions - I need to have questions thrown at me so that I can learn more about who I am and who I want to be. So come on over, and check out the conversation!

The last hint - when I woke up this morning with a cat curled up beside my head on my pillow, one on my stomach, and several more scattered across the bed. Every time I turn around I am reminded of my purpose - to nurture and provide a safe, loving home for all of the cats who have appeared in my life.

The first hint - when the aforementioned cats started magically appearing in my life. Wherever I went, there was another one in desperate need of care or a safe place to live. Always, I found it impossible to say "No!" when there was nowhere else for the furry little ones to turn. After all, what's one more?

Hope, in the face of seeming disaster. With the worldwide economic effects of some very abusive and negative policies, affecting all of us to one degree or another, with the potential for catastrophe looming, I still find myself feeling very positive about what this crisis means for the future of humanity.

We have lived lives of overconsumption and overindulgence for far too long.While a relative few have simplified their lives and discovered that what really matters is not what you have, but who you are, now it seems that the rest of the population is ready to get on board. Thank goodness!

Thank you! I love you! Bless you all!

I am truly blessed to be going to college at last! Every day is a blessing and a thrill, and I love every step I take on the path towards a formal education. I was afraid when I started that I wouldn't be up to pulling this off, but it has turned out to be a lot easier than I expected. I guess life-experience is truly a benefit when it comes to these things. I am now in my second semester of college, got a 3.8 GPA the first semester, and am pulling down all As this one. I made the Dean's List - hooray! And I just received an invitation to join the Phi Theta Kappa society. I can hardly believe how wonderful this all is!

My greatest thrill is how valuable Gaia has been on this journey, towards confronting the world outside and succeeding in it. So many people have been such a huge inspiration and support to me. Thanks to everyone I have met so far, and to those who I will encounter in the future. Namaste!

That feeling of swelling in your heart/soul when you are gazing into the eyes of someone that you love and adore, knowing that you want them to be completely happy, and praying with every fiber of your being that they are living the life the Universe has blessed them with to the ultimate degree of fulfillment. That feeling is just too all-encompassing to describe adequately!

Usually, in my own very uniquely delineated mind. It's full of nooks and crannies, hidey holes and caverns, with wonderful secrets around every turn. But sometimes I just find myself hiding in the eyes of one of my feline companions, losing myself in a renewing gaze of adoration and bliss. The whole world just disappears, and time slows to a crawl!